If you know me you know that my partner (Ben is his name in case you don’t know) is Australian. We live in Australia, or at least we’re in the process of trying to.
The past year and a half we’ve been together we’ve unfortunately had to spend a decent amount of time apart due to visa issues, and Ainsley’s birth which took place in Canada.
Long distance sucks, and it’s no secret that it’s very hard. Especially when you have a child together, that just adds a whole other element of shittiness…
But if I can offer any tips to people doing long distance these would be them;
Sounds obvious but it’s the key to making long distance work. Since you aren’t together to share the big or little things that happen make you talk to each other. Tell your partner what’s going on in your day to day life. Make them feel like they aren’t completely out of the loop being so far away. This works both ways so make sure to always be asking your partner about their life as well. Make time each day to really talk to each other, if like me there’s a massive time difference make sure you guys both agree on times to talk that work for your schedules.
- Don’t Hide Your Feelings
Don’t pretend everything is all sunshine and rainbows, because it’s not. Long distance blows and we all know it. Tell your partner your true feelings, so you guys can talk them through and work out issue.
Bottling up your emotions will just back fire down the road, and no one wants that. So be open and honest about your feelings, if you feel sad and shitty, let it out!
- Send Pictures
No not the dirty kind you sickos (well I mean if you want.) But just sending pictures of things your doing, your face, things like that! It makes texting more personal. I ask for a picture of Ben’s face at least once a week cause I miss it.
- Call when it’s something important
When it’s something exciting or important make sure to have the conversation over the phone. It makes the moment more personal and you are able to hear the persons emotions. Sometimes emotion gets lost in text, so talking via phone, FaceTime, Skype, can help make the moment more special or serious.
- Don’t Give Up
I know it’s hard, and sometimes you may feel like it’s never going to work but trust me it will! Time apart is only temporary and in the big scheme of things it’s not that long when you compare it to spending a lifetime together. Something Ben and I always tell each other is that it’s short term pain for long term happiness. We may have to spend almost a year in total apart but we have so much of our lives left to be together!
If you really love the person, it’s totally worth it. And once you see them you cherish your time together that much more.
Hopefully if you’re in the same boat I am you can take something from this!
And don’t forget the famous saying, “distance makes the heart grow fonder.”